Time

"Tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow,
Creeps in this petty pace from day to day."

William Shakespeare

The older I get, the more I realize how fleeting life is. When I was younger it seemed that time couldn't move fast enough. I was always in a hurry "to get there" -- to grow up, to finish school, to get married, to buy that first house... Now, I find that time moves so quickly that I cannot seem to hold on to any one moment, like sand sifting through my fingers. I have often told myself, "I must remember this moment..." only to find that the moment becomes buried and lost in time.

The other day I changed my last diaper. You would think that after fifteen years and more than 27,375 diapers (and yes, I actually did the math), this would be a momentous occasion. In truth it was quite the opposite -- rather anti-climatic and a little bit sad.

Within that instant I suddenly realized that there were moments that would never come again. Call me sentimental, but the realization that no more diapers meant no more babies touched something deep within me.

All the plans I had made for myself this year -- my time to finish that masters degree, my time to work on the career put on hold for so many years, my time to "rediscover myself" and "begin where I left off" -- all those plans suddenly seemed so insignificant.

I found myself frantically searching for more time... More time for all those things that for so long I wished would just "hurry up and happen". And, although I realize that I can never turn back (and I'm not sure I would even try), from this point on I will take time to savor each moment as it comes.